Funny Statuses, Quotes & One-Liners
Nobody talks about how brave you have to be to eat at a new restaurant without checking reviews first.
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I was going to tell a joke about time travel but nobody laughed.
When I was fired from my job as a stage designer, I just left without making a scene.
Day 44 without eating an apple... doctors are following me everywhere. the police are powerless to intervene.
I never use a napkin on my lap at a restaurant because I believe in myself.
Pepsi and Coke can't even be in the same restaurant together and society wants us all to get along?
My body just asked for water and I gave it a mini donut because nobody tells me what to do.
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