Funny Statuses, Quotes & One-Liners
My dog used to chase people on a bike. It got so bad, I had to take his bike away.
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I used to fear tall people. Now I look up to them.
I used to wonder what it would be like to read other people's minds. Then I got Facebook.
People often mistake me for being a good listener. The truth is, I really just don’t want to talk.
I learn from the people who take my advice.
People used to laugh at me when I would say "I want to be a comedian", well nobody's laughing now.
1988: Don't get into a car with a stranger
2002: Don't meet people on the Internet
2018: Uber
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