Funny Statuses, Quotes & One-Liners

Don't let anyone treat you like free salsa. You are cheese dip baby. YOU. ARE. CHEESE DIP.

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More silly statuses for social media you might enjoy

The doctor says my cholesterol count is so high that I can't even say "cheese" when I get my picture taken.

They've been treating me like one of the family, and I've put up with it for as long as I can.

Does anyone want to buy a broken barometer? No pressure...

Don't let anyone else ruin your day. It's your day. Ruin it yourself.

Does anyone know why we have to pronounce the g in longevity twice?

I am at the gym! Well, the parking lot. They have free wi-fi.

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