Funny Statuses, Quotes & One-Liners
I've never felt more like a dummy than the day I learned my proctologist is also a ventriloquist.
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People say "I hate to bother you." Maybe they should learn how to hate it a little bit more.
If I see one more person texting while driving, I am going to roll down my window and throw my beer at them.
We never really grow up. We only learn how to act in public.
I keep asking what LGBTQ+ stands for, but I never get a straight answer.
Who ever said "Out of sight, out of mind", never had a spider disappear in the bedroom.
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