Funny Statuses, Quotes & One-Liners

Food is an important part of a balanced diet.

You really got to hand it to short people, mainly because they can't reach it...

Teacher: I have 5 bottles in one hand and 4 in the other. What do I have in total?
Student: A drinking problem.

Piñatas are a great way to teach children that if you repeatedly beat something with a stick, eventually you'll get what you want.

Is the professor who instructs dental school students about dentures a Substitooth Teacher?

I'm on a seafood diet. If I see food, I eat it.