Funny Statuses, Quotes & One-Liners
My pipe dream was to become a plumber. Unfortunately, that went down the drain.
We haven't seen any Bigfoot pictures in a while. I sure hope he is OK.
Police have arrested the world tongue twister champion.
I imagine he'll be given a tough sentence.
I collect mouthwash bottles. They are kept in mint condition.
Why is there Kraft singles but no Kraft couples?
After careful consideration, manufacturers are not going to make yardsticks any longer.
Relationships are like a walk in the park. Jurassic Park.
I like eating Nerds because Iām secretly hungry for aquarium gravel. Nerds take the edge off.
I need at least 3 weeks advance notice before doing anything spontaneous.
Starting a page called Older Fans, where I tell everyone what hurts today and what small task I was doing that caused the pain.