Funny Statuses, Quotes & One-Liners

Do you know the worst part about books on rock climbing? Too many cliffhangers

I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that I don't know the answer.

I just found out it takes 5 sheep to make 1 wool sweater. I didn't even know they knew how to knit.

Some people think I am going crazy. The joke is on them. I went there years ago, fell in love with the place and decided to stay.

You come from dust and return to dust. That's why I don't dust. It could be someone I know.

Threw a ball for my dog. Extravagant I know, but he looks great in a tuxedo.